The Bruce Report- Volume 98

The Bruce Report- Volume 98 The Regular Guy Movie Reviews Papa Hemingway- 2 Little Brucies Some historical content, but i found the content and acting very average! Go see it if you are fan of Ernie! Mothers Day- 2. 5 Little Brucies Can be a little tear jerker! For the ladies  Keanu- 1.5 Little Brucies No, it's not about actor Keanu Reeves, it's about a lost cat and how Comedians Key and Peale try to get him away from hoodlums and gang members! Awful!

My Favorite Cooks- Not Chefs Mama Lena Bertucci Rose Mazetti- (My Nona) Mary Gandolfi- ( My Aunt) Dori Bertucci- (My sister in law) Maria Pichetti Mrs Medici Donna Piracchi Virginia Menucci Lina Lunardi Hoss Favelli (Ex wife) When she is not angry! These ladies were awesome!    Thoughts And Stuff We have a Fountain of Youth! Have about a Fountain  of Smarts! Learn from your parents mistakes! Use Birth control! Money isn't everything but it sure keeps the kids in touch! Why do people leave out auto's worth thousands of dollars, but store junk in their garage? Why is is it called rush hour, when the traffic is the slowest? When we were utes we called cigarettes, fags! Now it is an insult! We called bald guys Cue Balls now bald is beautiful! Why Do Morons Always Find Me So  i went to the post office in Highwood to buy stamps and mail packages! The bill was $39 and i only had $37 in small bills! So i pulled out a$100 and the genius behind the counter said she could not cash it because she only had $ 100 in small bills in the drawer! Being able to add and subtract, i said give me back $61 and i would leave! She said she couldn't do it! Wondering why, i asked to see the Postmaster and she also said she couldn't do it because there would be no change for the other customers! Now my Italian temper was starting to burn! So i said after i leave go to the bank and get some change! She said she couldn't leave the P.O. and replied that i had seen her out at lunch in Highwood so it's O.K. to feed your fat ass then it was all right to leave the building! So Little Brucie had to drive to the bank and change his C-note and go back for the last time to the Highwood P.O.! I think God said to all the morons on the North Shore, "Go find Little Brucie and aggravate him"! You can't beat fun at the old ball park! i feel better now!   It looks like a great weekend for Mothers Day! Remember their is nothing better than a mothers love! See you next week! Bruce B.

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The Bruce Report- Volume 96

The Bruce Report- Volume 96 The Regular Guy Movie Reviews Criminal - 2 Little Brucies A very hard to believe film! The plot is OK, but the movie tries to make us think that the events can happen! Wait for the DVD!  Everybody Wants Some - 2 Little Brucies It's about a college baseball team that wants to get drunk, smoke pot and get laid in a four day period! I found it average! Young teens and mid twenty's will like it more than i did! Miles Ahead - 3 Little Brucies A great performance by Don Cheedle sets the tone of a ten year period of Miles Davis's life! Worth seeing! AA worthy!

New Televisions Shows Just letting you know that i seldom watch reality shows  (Except The Voice) so there will never be a review of them! The Catch-ABC- 7 Tortellacci's- A little far fetched, but leads Peter Krause and Mirielle Enos have a great chemistry and i think this show has a chance to survive! Game Of Silence- NBC- 6.5 Tortellaccis- A loose remake of the movie Sleepers where four young boys are sent to a youth prison and are forced to have sex with the guards and warden! Now it is payback time! I will give it a little more time! The Real O'neals- ABC- 3 Little Tortellacci's- Not funny! Walk on by! Couldn't carry Modern Family or The Goldbergs jocks! Dice- HBO- 5 Little Tortellecci's- 2 episodos seen and i am not impressed! Stick to stand up Andrew! Criminal Minds Beyond Borders- CBS- 5.5 Tortellacc's- Even though it stars Highland Parks own Gary Sinese it is not very interesting or exciting! I hope the show makes it! In case you didn't know Gary does a lot for veterans!   Our Big Announcement. My Favorites Bands No not singers or groups (Next Week) 1. The Beatles 2. The Rolling Stones 3. The Cream 4. Led Zepplin 5. The Beach Boys 6. Jimi Hendrix Experience 7. The Doors 8. The Who 9. Queen 10. The Eagles 11. U2 12. Journey 13. Pink Floyd 14. The Animals 15. Heart 16. Santana 17. The Kinks 18. Kiss 19. AC/ DC 20. The Delvets   The Worlds Most Evil Men 1. Adolph Hitler 2. Joseph Stalin 3. Henrich Himmler 4. Pol Pot 5. Benito Mussolini 6. Idi Amin 7. Atilla The Hun 8. Oliver Cromwell 9. Saddam Hussein 10. Caligula 11. Ivan The Terrible 12. Jim Jones 13. Charles Manson 14. Jeffrey Dahmer 15. Andy From Beinlichs 16. The 1969 New York Mets Well gang it looks like it's happy trails time again! Drive safely, hug your kids and stay healthy! See you next week Little Brucie

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The Bruce Report- Volume 95

The Bruce Report- Volume 95

` The Regular Guy Movie Reviews I Saw The Light- 3 Little Brucies! Nice Bio of the short life of Hank Williams! Excellent music plus a great performance by Tom Hiddleson! Boss- 2 Little Brucies A few funny parts in this Melissa McCarthy comedy! Foul language, but a lot of stupidity!  God Is Not Dead 2- 2.5 Little Brucies Nice story, with you can guess, religious overtones! Meet The Blacks- 1 Little Brucie I would rather meet my ex wife than watch this awful, unfunny film! How do crappy movies make the big screen! Demolition- 2.5 Little Brucies Nice performance by Jake Gynenhall  in the sad weird film! Hardcore Harry- 2 Little Brucies A lot of shoot em up action, except that you are watching the film from Henry's viewpoint! That means the camera is bouncing up and down! Very discerning! My Name Is Doris- 2.5 Little Brucies  Sally Field puts on a quite a show as a 70 year old hanging with 30 year olds! A little too cute for me but the ladies will love it!  Highland Park- A Nice Place To Caddy Back in the sixty's there were 7 place to caddy and the pay varied at each place! Old Elm- The pay was OK, but with only 150 male members who had a second club Shore Acres- Onwentsia- Exmoor- Knollwood there was not a lot of play! Highland Park Country Club- HPCC opened in 66 and was not a great place to make a few dollars! Exmoor- A Lot of play, paid $3.50 later $4.00 a bag! Most members gave a 50 cent tip unless you carried for Peer Pederson or Jim Fitsgerald who gave you a dollar! Sunset Valley- Yes back in those days they had caddies! Paid $3.00 a bag and when their wallet opened the moths flew out! Bob-O-Link! Another men only club the had wonderful members and paid pretty well! Had the great Joe DePalma as their coniving caddymaster Northmoor- Paid $ 5.50 a bag and had tons of play! No tipping! I once had a guest had me a five dollar bill and the member took it out of hands and gave it back to his guest! Said he will take care of the caddy! 50 years later i am still waiting! But the classy Herb Decker did give me a $100 tip when he won a big event! That's why i always take care of the caddy! Lakeshore- No play during the week but the best group of guys called "The Boys" Greens superintendent Adolph Bertucci would leave them little care packages around the course to clench their thirst and then meet them at Willies's or Scornavacco's for lunch! Caddies made good money at Lake Shore! But all the private clubs would sponsor caddies for  A Chick Evans Scholarship and gave a lot of North Shore kids a free ride to a Big Ten School and Marquette! Young Nick Castelli from HP just received one from Bob -o-Link! Others i can remember are Richard Biondi- Jerry Nustra- Shane Rafferty- Mile Fiore and many more! The Winery My friend Lorenzo De Vito of Highwood has bought the old American Legion building on Highwood Avenue and will soon be doing a massive overhaul to the 90 year old building! It will be called the Winery and feature wines from all over the world plus food and entertainment! So Fabulous! Good luck Lorenzo! End OF AN ERA For over 70 years a Bertucci has been handling Memorial Day Ceremony's honoring the 22 heroes from Highwood that passed away during the past wars! Bruno 70 and Bruce One! I was told that the new commander of the American Legion and the commander of the VFW are taking over and my services will not be required! Sad, but i am sure they will do a good job! Sorry about last week but it was unavoidable, but like a bad habbit i'm baaaack! See you on the flip side Bruce B.

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The Bruce Report- Volume 93

The Bruce Report- Volume 93 The Regular Guys Movie Reviews Batman Vs Superman- 2 Little Brucies Disappointing film and terrible performances by Jesse Eisenberg as Lex Luther, Henry Carvil as Superman and Gal Gardot was no Linda Carter as Wonder Woman! Ben Affleck did a credible portrayal as Batman! Not a good story! My Big Fat Greek Wedding 2- 2.5 LBS Ok sequel of mom  and pop getting remarried! Same characters! Kind of cute! Nice family wedding!

Bertucci Easter! We celebrated Easter as my Sister in-Law Dori's house! And while it was our first Easter without Bruno, A good time was held by all 16! Dori under my guidance " ( Not Really) prepare a delicious dinner! And there was a lot of good news! Niece Michelle was promoted to supervisor at her logistic company! Niece Allison was hired as program supervisor at Comcast Sports Net! Cousin Darcy was hired by Nike and is moving to Portland Oregon! Step Son Zack was hired as the Chicago Rep for a New York company! Son David is producing a Television Pilot that he is hoping to sell to the networks or stream! It has stars Parker Stevenson and Martin Kove " The bad SenSei in The Karate Kid" as two of the leads! Also someone you all Know and Love will be heading for Los Angeles to perform a small speaking part in early May! Lynne has just completed two years at The Zodiac Room in Neiman Marcus and still loves working days only! Finally in a huge upset Connie "Chick" Zenezek won the eggs cracking contest beating her favorite son Danny in the finals! Sorry Danny! That's how the egg cracks! My Fearless Baseball Predictions National League East- Washington Central- St Louis West- San Francisco Wild Cards- Cubs- Pittsburgh American League East- Yankees Central- Kansas City West- Angels Wild Cards- Red Sox- White Sox  World Series Cubs Vs White Sox Winner Cubs Two days later the world ends! Sometimes I Think Too Much Never pretend your something your not! Stay Active! After you retire there is only one big event left! I am not ready yet! My Little Brother Scott took so long to graduate from SIU that he was there during four Presidents! Nixon, Ford, Carter, and Reagan! I could have been a Rhodes Scholar except for my grades! A Government that robs Peter to pay Paul, can always count on the support of Paul! No matter what towns i go to, the worst drivers always seem to follow me! Growing up every time i seem to get my room exactly how i wanted it, my Mother made me clean it up!

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